Toilet Paper Etiquette

Q: I am so stoked! I just moved into my very first apartment! It is awesome!!! But I want everything perfect, you know? But one thing I don’t know. My friends will really think I’m stupid if I ask them. Which way do you put the toilet paper? I can’t remember if it’s over the top or down the back.

A: Back when I was a teen-ager I remember Dear Abby having a question like this. My feelings on the subject are about the same now as they were then. Who cares?!?! It’s your house! Do whatever you want. There is nothing more wonderful than coming home from work to a house that is exactly like you want it. So have it like you want it. But, just in case it is really important to you to have my opinion, I’ll tell you what I prefer. Now that I’m older, I can’t make it through the night without a bathroom trip. So I prefer my toilet paper to go over the top and away from the wall. That way I don’t have to fight the wall for possession of the toilet paper. Trust me. At 2 in the morning, when you’re half asleep, that wall can be a formidable opponent. Not that I always get it over the top. Other people in my house hang the paper, too. But when I get a chance, that’s what I do. Enjoy your new apartment.

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