Do you want to know why ‘Johnnie can’t read’?  I’ll tell you.  It’s because their parents are keeping them so busy going to dance lessons, sports practice, piano lessons, play dates, karate classes, church activities, after-school events, shopping, birthday parties….  Need I say more?  The kids never have time to discover that sitting down and reading a book can be fun.

A:  I agree that many children today are on a very frantic schedule.  Parents have been encouraged regularly to give their child activities that they can enjoy.  And children do need something that they can do that sets them apart from others.  It gives them a sense of accomplishment and improves their self-esteem.  Unfortunately, things can escalate to the point you describe where the child becomes a jack-of-all-trades and a master-of-none.  They’re moving so frantically, that they never have time to stop and think what they do enjoy.   I would suggest that all families have a daily relaxation time.  It would be good for both the parents and the children.     It’s a wonderful stress reliever for the parents and it will give the children time to find what they enjoy.  Like reading a good book.

I am so sick of everyone telling me to stop smoking!  I’ve tried.  I’ve been smoking two packs a day for at least a year.  Even if I didn’t crave the nicotine, it’s just too much of a habit for me to break.  I tried a program my company paid for.  I managed a whole week while I was at work.  But on the weekend, while I was home alone, I just kept grabbing cigarettes without even thinking.  I tried to stop myself but by the time the weekend was over, I had smoked a whole pack.  So maybe you should start telling people to mind their own business!  We smokers know it’s not good for us.  We just can’t do anything about it.

A:  People who care about you are always going to be encouraging you to live a healthier life.  After all, they love you and want you around for a while.  And you can do something about it!  You are seeing yourself as a failure when, in fact, you were improving.  You tell me you smoked two packs a day for almost a year.  All week, you smoked nothing.  And then, on the weekend, when you did smoke, you only smoked one pack.  That’s three packs better than you had been doing before you started the program.  Everything you do in life takes practice to get it right.  Those Olympic swimmers didn’t just jump in the water and start swimming.  It took practice to get it right.  They were slow at first but they kept on pushing.  You do the same thing with that smoking habit.  Just keep on practicing until you get it right. 

I am a sophomore in college this year. I have been staying with my father this summer. I have mostly lived with him as I have been growing up. He has had a lot of different girlfriends, some who have lived with us, and two that I have close relationships with. I am getting married and want to invite some of my father’s old girlfriends to the wedding. His new girlfriend, who is almost my age, is really upset. My father hasn’t said  much. Do you think I should?

 A:  I think that this is your wedding and the people that have been close to you should be invited to help you celebrate this occasion.  If your father objected to his old girlfriends attending you might want to give it further thought.  After all, your parents are the ones who have always had your best interests at heart.  They are also the ones who have been with you all your life and will continue to do so as long as they live.  Since he doesn’t seem to be objecting, I would say go ahead with your plans to invite whomever you choose.